I once heard it said, “If you chase two rabbits, both of them will get away.” I agree with this statement wholeheartedly. It says a great deal about the importance of being “all in” and focused on a singular goal. But this time last year, I was faced with a situation where I was struggling with honing in on one proverbial rabbit. I lived in Saint Louis, Missouri one-and-off for nine years of my life. I consider it a second home. I love my historic house downtown, the warmth of the people and the diversity of the city. When I moved back to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania in January of last year, it was a big adjustment. I hadn’t lived in my birth city since 1981. A lot had changed since them, most of all with me. The last time I was there I was an insecure, confused teen, not sure about what my life’s purpose was going to be.
When it came time to make the change, I was torn. No matter how much I prayed for direction or clarity, I had both cities on my radar. I knew the change I had to make. I had already promised my earthly and spiritual father I would do that and I intended to keep that promise. Was I chasing two rabbits? Was I worshipping two masters? Was I being disobedient? But I dared to pray a bold prayer. I prayed that somehow, someway, I could still be allowed to enjoy and work in both towns.
And God granted that prayer. It was so obvious once I focused on the fact that God does want to give us the delights of our hearts. Psalm 37:4 says, "Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart." And this was my delight; to be able to be close to my biological family and grow the tremendous legacy my father left us, as well as to spend time with my second family in the Midwest enjoying the marvelous relationships and connections we had started.
I just got back from a weekend in Saint Louis and it was such a time of blessing and renewal. A lot has changed in the past year. Despite the tough economic times, I have several close friends who have moved up into better positions. I have one that is finally enjoying fulfilling her full time passion of pastorship. I have another that opened her own business and I got to patronize her gorgeous establishment. I saw old neighbors pass by while I was working in my city garden and waved at cars driving by. As I write this, I am back in Pennsylvania and am tired, but truly happy. In fact, I could say I am actually so tired of being happy, it’s wearing me out!